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Archive for June, 2010
It seems like everyone today talks about the importance of story, of telling your story and of differentiating your idea with story. Consultants and bloggers explain the different types of stories and companies jump on the bandwagon.
Why? Because a good story starts a conversation. And a conversation can start a relationship. And a relationship can move mountains.
What makes a good story? It’s relevant, authentic and intriguing (or at least interesting) to the listener.
What makes a great story? When the teller isn’t always the hero. It’s a lesson learned the hard way. Sometimes there are twists and surprise endings that don’t make the teller look good at all, except for the fact s/he is telling it, to underscore that lesson learned.
Whether you’re an executive trying to make a point, a parent or teacher attempting to persuade a child, or a sales professional trying to motivate a buyer to act, tell your story to help the other person trust your message.
We (staff, clients, customers, children, students, etc.) are hard wired to buy into an idea based on emotion and justify with logic. That’s just the way it is.
Comments? Ideas? Suggestions? Would love to hear from you.
Have you ever noticed that your boss doesn’t always agree with what you suggest? Sometimes it’s because he/she just don’t agree the idea is good. Often, though, it’s because the idea wasn’t presented in a clear, concise, confident and competent manner. What impresses bosses?
A well-thought out message
Plan it before writing it. Know the outcome you want. Tell your boss right up front. Don’t write about why you think it’s a great idea, write about why your boss might think it’s a great idea. Be specific and complete.
A concise message
Great ideas get lost when the reader has to do the heavy lifting. Ramble and you’re done. You have a maximum of two, very short paragraphs (bullets encouraged) to persuade him/her (but really, if your idea doesn’t resonate within the first line, expect your message to be overlooked until, um, later). The point of those two paragraphs is to excite the reader so s/he wants to learn more.
A solution oriented message
Don’t write until you have a solution. Don’t ask them “what do you think?” Tell them what you’d like the next step to be and offer to take it, as soon as they approve your concept.
A correct message
You say your boss doesn’t care about typos or grammatical errors and that his messages are a mess of mistakes? He cares. It’s a case of do what I say not what I do Yes, it would be lovely if she took the time to show respect for you by proofing before sending (and it’s smart business, too because it takes more of your time to comprehend misspelled words and follow fractured phrasing) but don’t count on it. You’re being paid to pay attention to the details. He is being paid to contribute big picture. Oh, and bosses whotake the time to double check their messages before sending them to you have zero tolerance for people who don’t.
A smart and clever message
Every business has a culture that is supported by idiosyncratic ways of doing things, and jargon. Use the prevalent in-company buzz words to show your boss you get it. Review the way your executive writes and mimic his pattern (within reason – see above). Is she fluffy or concise? Does he include small talk or get to the point? Does she present positives before negatives or the other way?
Having your idea ignored because it doesn’t fit the company structure is one thing. Having it ignored because you explained it poorly is another.
What other ideas do you have to be heard? I’d love to hear!
Here is the fundamental flaw in relationship selling: Relying on it too much. Some sales people think if they write things like:
• It was a pleasure to speak to you.
• I’m looking forward to working together.
• I’m excited about the opportunity to work together.
that they’re relationship building, and that these statements actually resonate for the recipient.
The reality is that when all things are equal, every buyer buys from someone they like. But too many sales people focus too much on building a (wordsmithed but fake) relationship, instead of keeping their focus totally, fully, 100% on the buyers’ success, needs and happiness.
Forget telling them how pleased you are, or how much you look forward to making money (working together). Instead, zero in on the one thing that can actually differentiate you from everyone else: them.
Instead of telling me how pleased you are that we spoke, for instance, reframe the comment to focus on why they might be pleased they spoke to you. You might say something like: Thank you for your insights today. Based on the important points you mentioned…
Instead of telling me how much you’re looking forward to working together, tell me why I should/might look forward to working with you.
Reframe your focus. Love your customer and you’re likely to build a relationship. Love yourself but pretend to love them and you’re likely to lose out to a competitor who talks less about “relationship selling” and does more relationship building.
Your comments?
Show respect.
Respect them by writing truthful, clear, relevant messages.
Respect them by asking them to clarify what they mean and what they need rather than jumping to conclusions.
Respect them by thinking about the situation from their perspective instead of your own.
Respect them by engaging them in conversation rather than telling them what you think is best for them.
Respect them by eliminating details and data, regardless of how interesting they might be to you, if it doesn’t matter to them
Respect them by remembering that all adults – regardless of gender or age – want to be treated like adults.
Respect them by focusing on the present not the past.
Respect them by being present.
Respect them by taking the time to reread emails to see if you’ve said what you intended to, and if you’ve made it easy for them to understand and act.
Respect them by lightening up, relaxing and making it fun, interesting, entertaining, memorable.
Respect them by being authentic and ethical.
Respect them by speaking your truth lovingly and respectfully.
Respect them by helping them feel safe and smart.
Respect them by giving them reasons for deadlines or for anything.
Respect them by saying what you mean, meaning what you say, and saying it right the first time.
Respect them by stepping back and helping them save face.
Respect them by listening for points you can agree with.
Respect them by giving out what you want back.
It’s karma, baby.
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