I wish I could credit the person who was clever enough to write this. Instead, I can only tell you that I received it from a long, lost, beautiful second cousin.
If you need a laugh today, you’ll enjoy this sexist and so true communications truth.
(1) Fine: This is the word
women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is
only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to play slots before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing
here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to
a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re
welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE
sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ .. that will bring on a
(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying *)*)(* YOU!
(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is
something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s
response refer to # 3.
*SpeakerSue: Important! I have never used this one. (Thanks a lot.)